back.

Look, guys, I'm not going to say that my trip to Israel was a life changing experience. But I mean, I was physically closer to God, you know, being in what three religions claim is His favourite part of the world. Oddly enough, proximity didn't seem to affect sound quality.

Basically, I have a hard time telling people about Israel because I'm still trying to figure it out myself. I wish I could at least share some of the pictures I have right now, but I think my poor overloaded computer would fry itself out if I even approached it will the 700+ pictures I took. Soon. It is a gorgeous country.

And the last day we visited Caesarea Maritima -- on Monday I was frolicking on a Mediterranean beach -- and now I'm back to data entry and answering the phones in rainy and super gloomy Michigan. My brain hasn't come back with me, at least not right away.

But it'll have to come back, because I have a lot of work to do. V and I are about to commence a pretty rigorous rewrite on Consideration. I'd like to take another pass at The Exit Strategy and get it all dolled up for contest season (Nicholl quarterfinalists, here I come!). And, in other good news, my next project has been picked.

Back in December Script Doctor Eric, a writer and script analyst, held a mini screenwriting contest. You sent in your logline and first three pages, and Eric promised to give the top five finalists a free consult. I knew a woman who got her agent by placing in Eric's contest last year, so I thought I'd give it a try. I sent in The Exit Strategy and another rom com that I had tangled with a couple times last year, to no avail. It was a good, strong, marketable idea, the best one I had had yet -- and had probably stolen somehow from my Dad -- but I had never been able to get it off the ground. If it placed, I'd finally have the motivation to write the darn thing.

And now I have to write the darn thing.

'Cause I placed! I received the email right before I left for Israel, so it was a happy little start to my vacation. And what was even more fun was that one of my new screenwriting friends also placed! After whining and moping about how I was struggling to write, it was a nice shot of encouragement. I believe that if I can get The Exit Strategy straightened up and this rom com (tentatively titled Attachment Issues) cobbled together, I'll have the foundations of my portfolio.

And once I have stories that I am proud of, that I think are good, then I will start to plot my move to LA, to the beach and sunshine and obsessively skinny people.

romancing.

Hello, my name is Amy, and I'm a commitment-phobe.

I'm sure there's at least one boy out there -- maybe two -- going, "Yes! I KNEW it!" I'm sorry. It's not you; it's me, really. There's something about the emotional involvement of being with someone for more than twenty minutes that makes me want to leave the state. I could tell you why I'm such a cut-losses girl, but no one showed up here for that sentimental nonsense, did they?

Luckily the Hockey Player shares my trepidation about all things sappy. It took us nine months to admit to the L word to each other -- and I mean "like." [No guys, of course I don't mean 'like.' For real?] We have our one-year coming up next week, and for a while I was freaking out about it. Then I got over it. Maybe because I realized I was being dumb. Maybe because I'm just looking forward to a nice dinner out. Maybe because I'm leaving for Israel the next day and that's a great way to shake someone if you really need to.

There have been very few things I've been signed onto beyond a one year lease, but writing is one of them. I wish I could tell you how old I was when I started writing about the Island of Many-Colored Ponies, but all I know was that it was WAY before I started dating. In high school I spent as much time scribbling ideas down on napkins as I did doodling my married name in the back of my math notebook. I've turned down invitations just to get the day's writing in. Writing is, for better or worse, has been part of my identity and my future for as long as I can remember.

However, all is not well in our marriage. Times are tough. It's been feeling a bit one-sided lately, like I've been doing all the work and not getting any love back. I'm feeling neglected, ignored, and unappreciated. It's difficult to commit so much of your time and energy to something and see it go nowhere. At the end of my life will I be satisfied with the stack of screenplays in the closet, just to be able to say that I've written? Or will the monument to rejection hurt more than help? I do just fine on my own. I don't need writing. How long would you let yourself love someone without any acknowledgment? And am I taking this metaphor too far?

I know I just wrote about discipline. And I do have a project for V that I will pursue with vigorous commitment to make it the best story I can. But during the last few weeks, if I haven't wanted to write, then I haven't. And I'm going to go to Israel with my dad and my aunt and hope to have a spiritual revelation about life's purpose. I kid. I'm going to go to Israel and hope the Middle East doesn't fall into nuclear war while I'm there. I will be grateful for that divine intervention alone.

Meanwhile, the Hockey Player took me to see Star Wars in 3D this weekend, so I think I'll keep him around for a little longer. On the other hand, he doesn't get his own invitation to my best friend's wedding and I'm holding onto both the Coldplay tickets I won, but if he keeps doing what he's doing, I think his future looks good.

Reboot.

The holidays are over. Cut the fun. Back to real life.

V. mercifully released me from my self-imposed pre-Christmas draft 1.5. He had something like 32 screenplays to grade and apparently did not want to read a 33rd. Fair. I had a really fab holiday. I tried to shop local and small business for all my gifts and ended up having the most fun Christmas shopping that I've ever had. In what I consider resulting good (and ironic) karma, I got a Kindle Fire for Christmas, which has already proven its worth twice, once when I was stuck in the airport for five hours and last night when I realized it was the only way I could watch the Michigan-V. Tech Sugar Bowl.

Ah, Michigan.

I'm not going to do an end of the year post. 2011 was fine but tumultuous, and I probably don't remember half the events anyway. But I will do 2012, a year in preview --

1. Michigan will be mighty.

2. I am going to Israel. I feel super lucky that I'm getting to take a trip to Israel with my aunt and dad (er, and Mike Huckabee). Israel and New Zealand have spent the last five years jostling for top spot on my Top 184 Places to Visit. Guess New Zealand will have that trophy all for its own now.

My mom said she wouldn't come with us because she didn't want her children to be completely orphaned.

3. I will drink more water. Well, maybe.

4. We're making a movie. More precisely, a movie I wrote. It may be cold and dark now, but in just a few short months I will be breezing from my desk to set, where I will huddle in a corner, since I doubt we will have those fun movie set chairs, and watch people act what I wrote. Expect pictures. 'Cause I'm taking a lot.

5. There will be a wedding, and I reign as MOH. That's Maid of Honor, suckas!

6. If I feel like it, I will rewrite and e-publish my NaNo novel. I like it. It'd be fun. You know, if I feel like it.

7. I will watch more movies, read more scripts, write more pages. Scott Meyer's has a great 1, 2 , 7, 14 plan that I will emulate.

And that's it for now. There's other stuff, waiting in the wings, that will make an entrance at the right time.

I know on New Year's Eve, people always think the next twelve months will be a good year. Everyone has a 'feeling.' I don't have a feeling. I have a knowing. How could I look at that list and not know?

However, I do have a 'feeling' that there will be a lot of dance parties.

Other Things.

1. I am still behind on my novel. But it's going to be ok. I just killed off a character, it's good.

2. I don't remember the last story I wrote where the main romantic pair got together in the end. And when I last wrote a happily married couple, I killed one of them in the end. Er. Is that a reflection of my psyche?

3. Let's keep moving.

4. I saw Mat Kearney in concert last week. Amazing. I'm a little resentful that he's got a super cute wife, but whatevs. We all move on.

5.

6. Have you been to Whole Foods lately? I went yesterday to get some chocolate covered espresso beans and I caved and bought some chocolate covered toffee almonds as well. The one in town has this cute little wine bar in the middle of the store. I'm pretty sure I'm going to make the Hockey Player take me there on date night asap.

7. I cannot wait until he and I jump in my bullet-holed minivan on Wednesday and start weaving through the Thanksgiving day traffic like the accident prone people we are. Route 80, all the way! [along with about 90,000 other people, awesome.]

8. If you had to choose between moving to LA asap or living in the middle of nowhere for a few more years and shooting your own ultra low budget mumblecore, what would you do? 'Cause I've started saving for either of those options, and it's getting to be a conundrum about which to get excited about.

Most Culturally Relevant Halloween Ever!

The Big News.

1. I still fit into my high school graduation dress, suckas!

But that's not it...

2. I am about to be a paid screenwriter.

Money. In my Pocket. For words. That I wrote. I am about to get paid. For words.

Here is the story -- I still keep in touch with my old screenwriting professors, and one of them floated an idea by me and asked if I would help develop it with him. Yes and yes. I expected we would meet a few times, spit ball ideas around, and just sort of break the monotony of writing alone by developing the idea together. I was a little nervous about having to be brilliant on the spot with a former professor, but I was excited to work with someone for a change.

It was like a small town Hollywood courtship meeting.

He bought me my drink (lemonade, but I kept it medium, no need to be flashy), and we small talked. We hadn't seen each other since he had given me notes on my TV pilot. And then it got down to business. We would develop the idea together through weekly meetings, and once we had nailed down a treatment, we'd register with the Writers' Guild with joint story credit. Then I'd take our treatment, outline, and beat sheet (yeah, way more prewriting than I ever do) and work out the screenplay. I'd register my first draft with the Guild and get sole writing credit. He'd shoot the script low budget next summer and edit it in the fall.

I was set to go, by this point. The prospect of having my words filmed was motivation enough for me. But then he flattered me even more -- he offered me money. It wasn't an extravagant amount (he's a professor, guys) and at first I waved my hand -- unnecessary, Professor -- but he was insistent. He said, he thought about what he would want in this situation and that the money was an investment in the project that he wanted to do. We reached an agreement.

Guys, I'm going to write a script, and then I'm going to stand in front of a video feed and watch those words. There's going to be a script, and then there's going to be a creative team, and then there's going to be a cast, and then there's going to be locations and sets and a shooting schedule and footage and hours and hours in the editing room.

And then there's going to be a movie.

That I wrote.

And sometime after that, there'll be another. And another. And another and another and another...

Not so nice.

I have a problem.

I was hoping it was just restricted to the film industry, which is dominated by bull-headed adolescent man boys. But apparently it's just something about me.

People think I'm nice.

I did everything I could think of, short of actually being mean and standoffish. I thought maybe it was because I suddenly look young (seriously, I was never told I look young for my age until I graduated college). So I cut off all my hair. I got a new job where I can dress like an adult. And yet, last week, a couple of my new coworkers (literally, they're a couple. Husband and wife) told me I reminded them of their nice, who is just SO sweet and SO nice.

You think this wouldn't be a problem, people thinking I'm nice. But the problem is, people think I'm just so nice, and then they don't take me seriously. Which is an actual problem. Just because I'm pilot and reasonably courteous, I'm not timid or dumb. In the film industry, you can just give off a lot of attitude and get some balance that way. You can't give off attitude in an office setting.

Maybe I just have to wait it out, until people can believe a person can be nice AND young AND competent. Maybe I just have to wait until I get old, and people start believing I have graduated college. The only thing I know I am going to do is bring in my fresh batch of French macarons to work tomorrow. I'm sure baked goods are just going to compound my problem, but if I didn't get rid of the things I baked, I'd have an all new personal problem.

EDIT: I'm not saying I AM nice, mind you. Just that that's how people perceive me. I'm just nominally polite and apparently young looking, and I am not responsible for how people interpret that.

Sometimes I say things to not look like an idiot, but instead I just prove it.

Last weekend I went to a goodbye party for a friend who was moving to China. I got to meet a lot of new people, which allowed for the always long story of where I'm from, what I'm doing, and what I want to be doing (seriously, I never think my life is complicated until I start telling this story. And usually I just skip the bit about England).

I got talking with my friend's dad about how I wanted to be a writer, and he said, "That's a tough career. A lot of people try it, and very few can make any money off it."

And I said, "That's true, which is why I think the key to having a sustainable writing career is to diversify, produce everything from screenplays to short stories so you can tap into the market from all angles."

And as he was nodding his head, all I could think was WHAT? Where did that come from? I've never said that before in my life, and I don't even really think it's true. I said it because I was to scared to admit to this person, who has relatives in the film business and legitimately knows how difficult it is, that I'm gambling a whole lot of time and energy on something that could turn out to be a big black hole. I couldn't say, "Yeah, screenwriting is more commonly a source of frustration than money but I'm going to do it anyway," because I didn't want to sound like some starry-eyed high schooler with her fingers crossed for NYU. So I made something up and just sounded dumb.

I do write more than screenplays. I write short stories and sometimes novel excerpts and these amazing blog posts, but it's not because I think I'm going to make a career out of them. It's because I enjoy all those modes of storytelling. I'm still learning not to be embarrassed about being a writer, even about being an unpublished/unproduced writer. I hope that next time someone says, in essence, "Oh you want to be a writer? That's a tough field," I'll be able to say, "You're right, it is. And I'm going to rock it out anyway."

PS. I finished that short story I've been working on. It's 18 pages of mess, but it's also 18 pages of awesome. Maybe you guys can't tell from my blogs, but I'm really not half bad.

More Soon.

It's been a perilous past couple days.

Actually, that's not remotely true. It's rather settled at frustrating, with my room remaining stubbornly hot while the outside part of the world becomes surprisingly cool. Every season I forget how Michigan weather goes.

Also, apparently it's a thing to bring your TV camping now? I did not know. But while on a twenty-four hour camping trip with friends (which, now that I think about it, was less than safe at times), we saw several families huddled around a TV set -- in their tent! What is wrong with the world!

Can we talk about spec script sales for a minute? According to Scott Myers, spec script sales are up 84% this year to date. I honestly don't know what else a writer would do to try to break into the industry BESIDES write a spec [EDIT: Ah, I forgot, Tumblrs and Twitter Feeds], but hallelujah for the resurrection! To all the people who said the spec market was dead, eat 84% of your little heart out. Go us! [And by us I mean you real people making money off this crazy thing.]

Are you guys following ScriptShadow? Are you? Because what I'm trying to say is, he said something really great last week, and I'm trying for the life of me to figure out what it was, but I'm drawing a blank. It might have been how truly hilarious comedies always seem to need that one character who will "go there" to ridiculous lengths [a la Zack Galifinikas]. This character, interestingly enough, is rarely the main character. And in female driven/targeting rom coms, it is ALWAYS the best friend of the career driven, detail oriented, Miss Lonely Hearts protagonist. Wouldn't it be great if we had a rom com where the female lead was the ridiculous one? Kind of like Juno, at 25? Or my own script, The Exit Strategy? [Please email for read requests.]

I'm on the fourteenth page of my current short story, and I'm getting that delicious feeling of tumbling down toward the end. Any day it could happen. It's inevitable. It's set up, I'm prepared, all we need is an afternoon or two at the keyboard and away from Facebook. I've been reading old Nebula winners too. Writers should be readers if only because it inspires us to be better writers.

I'm sorry about the excessive punctuation tonight. I don't know what came over me.

Things that Have Happened in the Last 6 Weeks

1. I thought my boyfriend died on vacation.

A couple weeks ago we got a chance to spend some time with my family in the mountains. It was good. I built a most awesome fire, we canoed under a bridge that we totally probably weren't allowed under, we crashed a small town Fourth of July parade comprising mostly emergency vehicles from four different towns. We also hiked seven miles along a mountain ridge over a cabin, which was pretty sweet. It's here I thought tragedy struck.

My dad, brother, the Hockey Player, and I had branched off from the main group to do the more hardcore hike (it's true). At one of the small scenic overlooks, my brother and the Hockey Player thought it'd be a good idea to throw rocks over the cliff. I did too, until it became apparent just how bad of an arm I have. When I got tired of being lame, I suggested we move on. I was barely back on the path when I heard another rock go over the cliff -- a LARGE rock. Like, a rock that somebody thought was stable enough to step on but totally wasn't and was now crashing down the mountain with its unfortunate mis-stepper to his death. I turned around -- and did not see the Hockey Player.

For about half a second, I was convinced we'd lost him. And then he wandered out from behind my dad. I was relieved. I didn't want to have to explain that to his mom. She bought me a really beautiful pair of shoes last time I went to see her.

2. I quit my job. I am pretty stoked about that.

3. I had a great idea for The Exit Strategy. It was the perfect development, the extra layer that makes this story different from the rest of its genre, the answer to so many problems. Basically, I just made things worse for my main character. That always seems to work. Truly, I was thinking about my own life, and realizing, "Oh man, I really hope THAT never happens. That would suck to the max." And when you have a thought like that, the best thing to do is make it happen to someone else. Someone made up, preferably.

The last time I wrote about The Exit Strategy, I was working on the outline for the second draft. I'm now halfway through that second draft. I'm about the kill the midpoint. In a good way.

4. I started writing fiction again too.

Holidays and Hostages.

I don't have anything to say about hostages. Let's just say it's better than the first consonance I thought up.

Since weekend holidays aren't lengthy enough to justify the trip back home, I spent Easter with the Hockey Player's family. It was nice, and I ate a lot. I did not much get writing done, but I'm pretty sure I got a pass.

There was one moment, as we were sitting around before dinner on Saturday, that I kinda felt like an idiot. I was talking with one of the other women, who was bouncing her newborn, her third son, on her knee when she started to ask me about my writing. I told her I was working on a screenplay and a novel. The trouble started when she asked me what my novel was about.

I hate. hate. hate summarizing what I'm working on. Because this is what I sound like--

"Oh, you know, it's like a fantasy."

To her credit, she continued to ask. "So are there dragons and things?"

"No, you know, it's more like a subtle fantasy." Really? Subtle fantasy? Who am I, some emo high schooler pretending my swords-and-sorcery novel is literature?

And then, because I have to divert the conversation away from my writing but keep it on me, I start to justify my choices.

"Genre novels, paranormal, fantasy, are actually doing really well on solely virtual platforms, like Kindles and e-books. So if it works well, I'd really like to look into self publishing through the internet. People actually make livings that way."

If I had been that articulate, at least I only would have come across sounding like a pompous big-headed nerd. Since I sorta stumbled all over my words, I came across sounding like a dumb pompous big-headed nerd [the Hockey Player insists this wasn't so, but I'm pretty sure he was sleeping on the couch at that point].

And this woman, bless her heart, was nodding along like what I was saying actually made sense, all while I felt like a fourteen year old blathering on about my first novel attempt and how it was going to be brilliant enough that I'd actually make MONEY off of it.

But you know what? I really like this story. The more I think about it, the more excited I get. And whenever I figure out how to talk about it, I for sure WILL be talking about it.

Speaking of fantasy, while we were away for the holidays, George R.R. Martin's Game of Thrones, based on his Song of Fire and Ice books, some of my favourite books, premiered on HBO. Since one of the reasons I'm dating the Hockey Player is because he has HBO, I asked him to record it for us to watch when we got back.

I've literally been waiting for this series for over a year.

Needless to say, when we sat down to watch it, I was stocked. I broke the bank and bought name brand ice cream for the event. But when he pulled it up on the DVR, I was suddenly alarmed--

"Why is the description in Spanish?"

There was this silence, and then a very quiet, "Uh oh."

The Hockey Player doesn't just have HBO. He has HBO Latino. And guess which one he recorded.

Let's just say, lucky for our relationship, the episode was being offered on demand too. And the Hockey Player changed his DVR settings so that he'd record it in English. And it was pretty funny, too, watching the first five minutes, which has no dialog, and then to hear that dramatic first line--in Spanish.

I'm loving the series and wishing more and more that I had beyond basic cable [we don't even get TBS anymore]. Game of Thrones has already been picked up for a second season, so I told the Hockey Player that as long as he keeps his cable subscription around, he's got pretty good insurance on keeping me around too.

Sunshine and Sunburn.

I have not been writing.

I also have not been trying to wrangle a dozen babies, dodging rainy Michigan weather, or sleeping.

But I can tell you what I have been doing--

I've been bike riding on a palm tree-ed island. I've been paddling on a Yolo board in the Gulf. I've been renting a car for the very first time ever. I've been kicking it in to die for gold heels. And I've been eating insane amounts of ice cream, cinnamon roll french toast, and other delicious foods that are not seafood. Because I don't give in to peer pressure.

The Hockey Player planned a trip to Florida to visit his family, and I was invited to tag along. And I have to say, I don't feel guilty about not writing this belated spring break weekend, not even a little bit, not even at all.

I'm Back.

Well, maybe. We'll see how it goes. Blogging should probably be the least of my priorities...and yet it always seems to be the thing that gets done. Probably because it's pretty narcissistic.

How are you? What's going on? Things have been changing a lot out here. I don't think I realized it at first. Here's the run down--it involves a lot of cake--


I interned on a film called The Giant Mechanical Man in December. The film stars Topher Grace, Jenna Fischer, Chris Messina, and Malin Ackerman. It was rather surreal, seeing Jenna Fischer walking and talking in our production office. All the actors that I interacted with were so nice. But, over all, it was a very educational experience. Being an office intern, I got to observe a lot of the inner workings of the production office. The office staff was great at their jobs and willing to answer any of my questions. I did a lot of menial work, running errands, ordering lunch, data entry, and yes, getting coffee. Perhaps my favourite story is the time I had to take a producer's cat to the vet to get his health certificate for their flight home.

But when the film wrapped, I was broke and burnt out. It was an EDUCATIONAL experience. And, while I love working on set, I was no longer sure it was a career path that I wanted to pursue. When you're working on production, it's all consuming. I was interning, and I was still working 8-10 hour days, 6 days a week, doing airport runs at 4 AM. The other things that were important to me, my friends, writing, church activities, were pretty much cut from my schedule. I have a strong desire to live a balanced life, and maybe I'm in the wrong industry entirely for that, but I know at least working production doesn't allow for real, day to day balance.

One of my friends is working on Ides of March, George Clooney's movie that's in town. I asked her if she was having fun. Her face tightened up and she said, "It's stressful." I don't think I want my work to make my life stressful like that or at least not to be the first comment I make on it.

So, since I had gotten a small taste of (indie) film production from the two films I worked on, I decided to try the other route and take a non film job. I have a job in my fall-back career, childcare, and have (barely) enough time for writing, friends, church, and everything else I just enjoy doing.


I don't think I'll do any more production work for a while. Mostly because our new governor is adamant about shutting down the tax incentives (too bad about all those studios that are just opening here). But I am glad I got a chance to work in production. And when The Giant Mechanical Man comes out, look for my name in the credits.

Part of the reason I took a non-film job was to get more time to write. I definitely don't have the discipline I had this fall when I wasn't working (what a blissful time that was), but I'm slowly getting back into the groove. My writing focus has shifted a little. While I'm still plugging away on my current draft of The Exit Strategy (which, if I ever mentioned this story before, now has a completely different articulation), I'm starting to spend some time back in fiction. The goal of this year is publication, even if it's a tiny e-zine or an online newspaper. Baby steps. I think I'm just tired of being a writer who's always writing and revising and never seeing the end of any work. Also, I keep talking about how I can't wait until I can write for a living, but I spend all my time in a specific field of writing that is the most unstable for a real career. I'm not saying I'm going to be making my income solely off writing, or that fiction writing is more lucrative than screenwriting. Basically none of it's lucrative. But I've spent the last couple years focusing on my craft, not on business. Now that I'm supposed to be a real person with a real job and a real life, it's time to think about how this really pans out into a career. IF it really pans out into a career.


And the rest of life is going pretty great too. Winter is (supposedly) over, my roommie and I are talking about staying in Michigan another year together, and I'm dating a super great guy. He's in school and working at the ice rink driving the zamboni, which means when apocalypse is upon us and climate change causes Michigan to freeze over for real, we'll still be able to get around.

I'm not where I thought I would be six months ago. But I'm finding out, it's not so bad here either.

Theories and the Reality.

I hate the way people in Jersey drive. It's not just the massive amount of people on the road. There's zero consideration for anyone else. Cutting people off and braking, drifting over from an exit only lane without a turn signal, ridiculously bright lights on fancy cars. I have mixed feelings about driving as it is, and being in Jersey doesn't highlight the good qualities.

Tomorrow I pack it up and head back to Michigan. Another ten hour drive. I don't think I anticipated doing this so much. Next time I'm flying.

I try to go over to see my niece and nephew as often as I can. I have to say, I think I want a big family, but trying to manage a toddler and a newborn with both parents at home seems like a challenge. The difficult thing, my sister explained to me, is that at this stage, both of your children need all of your attention all of the time. Perhaps the only time my sister can get to herself is if both children manage to nap at the same time.

I've mentioned to her before about how I plan to continue writing when I have a family, and her response was, "Don't overestimate the free time you'll have." And even if I do get the time--will I have the energy? Last year working at a school, I had zero energy for writing after wrangling 23 2nd graders all day long.

I know there are ways to manage, schedules you can get into and routines you can form that will get you at least a few minutes a day to write when you're also raising a family. But other times I wonder if I'm selfless enough to be able to make that compromise. While a family is something I theoretically think I want, I've been mostly on my own for the last five years, pursuing something I know I want.

For now I'll enjoy being an aunt, spoiling my niece and nephew, babysitting for a few hours, and then returning them to their parents at the end of the day.

Hey-yo.

I'm an aunt twice over!

My sister [finally] had her second baby last night, this time a girl. [And this time, instead of a 36 hour labor, it lasted 2 hours. Nice.] We're going to go see her in just a few hours!

And yes, I've already bought her something.

Returns and Hobbitses.

Today I went back to the school where I worked last year. I hadn't seen any of my coworkers since I left last spring, so I met them for lunch. [I also stopped by to see the students. My Favourite Student offered me an invisible contract to come back and teach 3rd grade. I told him I'd have my lawyers look it over.]

The inevitable question came up--so what are you doing? [This came right after "Where are you?" with the answer of Michigan surprising some.] I realized very quickly there was no glamorous way to answer, "Nothing." I am literally doing nothing. I'm not even looking for a job right now. Granted, these two week "vacation" back to Jersey put a pretty definitely stop on any job searching.

If it was more than a passing conversation with the former coworker, I'd go into more detail, the probability that I'd be looking for a non film job soon, how I've been able to write obscene amounts since unemployed, my concerns with juggling a film career, a life, writing, and eventually, a family. However, I felt most conversations boiled down to one sentiment--Yes, remember when I worked here? Now I'm a bum.

I don't mind. Maybe because I watched a Scottish movie last night and am more persuaded than ever that what I really need to do right now is live in the UK. Also, I'd like to learn Italian.

The New Zealand actors union has lifted their ban on working for The Hobbit. Smooth move, but you might've waited too long. New Line is using the union's blacklist as leverage to say it's looking at different locations. Nikki Finke thinks Peter Jackson is too personally and professionally invested in New Zealand to make the move, but one Kiwi said on Scott Myers' blog that "it's nationwide panic."

Way to go, guys. You not only made a decision unpopular with your members, but you've also managed to upset an entire country.

Trees and Nerds.

I finally caught up with the rest of the world. I finally saw The Social Network.

It was great. And it was great for a whole bunch of reasons, the actors, the directing, the writing [yes, I have a celebrity writer crush on Aaron Sorkin]. I didn't have a problem with the portrayal of women. Maybe that's because it's a true story, and if there weren't really any women involved, then there weren't any women involved. [I've noticed something about people who objectify women anyway. Usually they just have a problem with objectifying everyone. Everyone is reduced to what they can offer instead of being recognized and treated as real multi-faceted people--male and female alike.] Besides, Erica Albright was spunky and I liked her.

I think my favourite part of the movie, though, was this surprising mystery element. The film jumps between three different storylines--what happened and the two lawsuits that followed. And the entire time, as accustations were made and explanations were offered, I was trying to figure out what really happened, if Mark really stole Facebook or not. If I was on a jury, what would I conclude? It was like a who-dun-it. It was excellent mastery of story that completely engaged me.

If you haven't seen it, I completely and highly recommend it. I wish I had seen it before Aaron Sorkin's lecture. I'm going to see if I can get my hands on a copy of the script.

My dad put this sheet of metal around the trunk of our tree in the backyard. It's to prevent the squirrels from building nests in the tree and taking over our backyard. I feel kinda bad for the squirrels though. Can you imagine one day you're out at work, winning bread for your family, and you come back to find a sheet of metal preventing you from every returning to your comfy bed? Eviction without notice. I'm not sure if I'm cool with that.

Nightmares and Hell.

I drove the 10 hours from Michigan to my parents' house yesterday. It was beautiful yesterday, and I made it in record time. I didn't tell anyone I was coming. It's nice to surprise people.

Unfortunately, all I dreamed about for the first half of the night was that I was driving through endless speed traps and past a plethora of police cars. Nothing like driving 600 miles only to dream about more driving when you finally get to sleep.

Deadline Hollywood broke a story about yet another Twitter to TV deal, "a comedy series based on Charlie McDowell's feed and Web site Dear Girls Above Me, about a single man who gains insight into the female mind by eavesdropping on his upstairs neighbors." This is CBS' third Twitter-based script order according to DH, along with Shh... Don't Tell Steve and $#*! My Dad Says. Dear Girls Above Me has gotten a script order to be cowritten by McDowell.

I hope this dies in development hell.

Look, I have no problem with web-based content being picked up for more traditional media, blogs turned to books, YouTube stars getting spots on talk shows, Twitters turned to TV shows [ok, that does sorta bug me]--if the content is any good. The $#*! My Dad Says feed is kinda funny. But I haven't bothered to watch the sitcom, so... Distribution is completely changing, and I'm not anti-progress. I think it's completely fair to "discover" talent online. And I wish McDowell continued success. But I do have some problems--

1. Just because you're internet popular doesn't mean you're Hollywood popular. McDowell may have a respectable following. I know if I ever broke a hundred followers I'd be thrilled, and he's near 35,000. Fine, I respect that. I respect that he's got a decent corner in the 140-characters of humor market. But if you make a TV show based on his Twitter feed and put it on network television--how are those 35,000 followers going to fair against competitors' programming? With Monday night football or The Big Bang Theory or Glee? How are you going to go from 35,000 to millions?

2. It's still a different format. A good writer is a good writer, true. I think all writing helps you improve your story craft. But the skills that go into making a Twitter feed funny are completely different than the ones that go into making a TV show funny. Networks do recognize that, I believe, which is why McDowell is only co-authoring the pilot and $#*! was mentored by sitcom veterans. However, just because something is funny in one format doesn't mean that it will translate effectively into another format.

3. Dear Girls Above Me isn't funny. I thought I'd check it out before I rail against it. It's not not funny. It's just not--anything special. And, I hate to be the humorless feminist in the room, but what a terrible portrayal of women. They are ignorant, self centered, and completely brainless. They're flat, one dimensional characters. Sometimes that works--Sue Sylvester from Glee was wonderful before they gave her the sister angle. But the way the Girls Above are depicted makes me cringe. Or, as one commenter at DH hypothesized, McDowell's going to inadvertently and unknowingly meet one of the Girls Above and fall in love with one of them. And that would just be tacky.

I don't think this is sexism on the part of the network because it works both ways. Shhh... Don't Tell Steve is about an idiot boy roommate. [I'd like to say people just being stupid isn't funny anyway, but the Jackass 3D box office proves me otherwise]. It still bothers me, and I think it's because men are continually drawn as fleshed out, full grown characters, but female characters regularly get slighted. Women are repeatedly depicted in TV and film not as characters but as plot points, foils, and objects of desire and ridicule. They do not exist except for how they are viewed and perceived by men. And that kind of characterization--not the one dimensionality--I strongly protest.

[EDIT: Elizabeth Banks posted this on her Twitter. I don't know where it came from, but it's fascinating. Not completely accurate, maybe--I'd argue some characters they don't list as being well developed as excellent examples of great characterization--but fascinating still. Female Character Flowchart.]

4. An audience? How many women do you think are going to be tuning into this show?

5. Really, CBS? All the material you get pitched and spec-ed and bombarded with and this is what you order? Now I just feel bad for all the talented television writers who just got screwed.

Speaking of people I feel pity for, as much as I love the Yankees, I feel kinda bad for the Rangers.

Fall and Road Trips.

Yesterday I was working on plots for the contest I mentioned a couple days ago. Even though you only have to write the first 15 pages, for those 15 pages to be killer you really need to know your whole story. Since Best Friend D. is a history nerd, I decided I'd float a few ideas past her.

Within two seconds she had pitched me the most beautifully twisted premise.

It's so unfair. But, I am blessed to be her friend and steal all her ideas from her since she has no designs on a story career. My dad also has this talent. I'll be pitching a story at the dinner table, and my dad will say, "What about..." It nearly sends me into a sulk. I mean, I'm the one who has a useless degree in story telling. I should be getting more mileage out of it.

Professional writers say that ideas are cheap and easily come by. I find them elusive and ethereal. However, I'm trying to be less aggravated by other people's genius and more inspired by it. Sometimes the best twist on a nearly perfect plot comes from a fresh perspective. Now I just have to learn how to have all those perspectives myself. This must be how writers go crazy.

My sister's about to pop with her second baby any day now. I've been waiting for the call to come home for the new little niece/nephew, but I'm thinking about forgoing the phone call and just heading home now. This is completely anxiety-inducing. I can't imagine being the pregnant one who has to deal with the waiting. I almost went today, but I had to spend time and money becoming a little bit more of a Michigander by surrendering my New Jersey driver's license to the DMV. Today would have been a perfect road trip day too. The weather was perfect and the leaves are beautiful [fall is my favourite]. I'm actually looking forward to the drive through Pennsylvania for once.

Also 30 Rock is live tonight and I didn't want to risk missing it.

Motels and Surrender.

Specs versus pilots continues. Kyle Killen, writer of Mel Gibson pic The Beaver and showrunner of the late Lone Star, said that when hiring writers he prefers to see a pilot but has also hired candidates off of outstanding specs. And on the topic of TV shows, New York Magazine recently ran an article, This Platform Is Not Yet Rated, discussing the difficulties in tracking ratings with the rise of online and DVR viewing. Neilsen is making some changes to their tracking system, but not until next year. The second page of the article has a couple interesting charts breaking down audiences of various shows by which platform they consume content on.

As far as last night's TV--Glee, I like your stories so much better this season. They're actually different from episode to episode. I don't think the existence of the glee club has been threatened in two entire weeks! But--song integration has really gone down hill. Every single song was set in the classroom as students perform for other students. The beauty of musicals is that they're set in a world where spontaneous eruptions into song and dance are not only tolerated as normal but encouraged and choreographed. Get it out of the classroom--make the song performances just as interesting as the stories are becoming.

I also watched Detroit 1-8-7 last night--which everyone should--and I was excited to see a location we had shot at when I was working in July. They had changed the name, but you could still see the real name in a window reflection for a quick shot. It was pretty cool. Probably because that location was so sketchy. Detroit 1-8-7 kinda makes me want to be a detective, but maybe that's just because I'm about to open up my career options.

I moved back to Michigan with the hope of breaking into the budding industry here. It has not been so easy. I worked on one film in July, but unfortunately the important contacts I made all went back home to LA at the end of the month. Which is too bad, because getting jobs is all about contacts, and I know I'd be working if I was in LA. HW Guy was telling me the other day about how the Key PA from our July shoot was considering moving to LA for a while and how if I could get out there, he would take the two of us on every shoot as his 2nd and 2nd 2nd. We'd be the dream AD team. And that people would actually like the AD team for a change [ADs are usually obnoxious. In fact, I told HW Guy so. I told him I thought 1st ADs were all supposed to be tools and that I was surprised when he wasn't].

But the truth is I haven't been working here in Michigan. I have had two other jobs lined up since then, and they've both fallen through due to poor communication and, frankly speaking, unprofessionalism. And now winter's coming and productions are not. I'm thinking about shifting my focus, taking a low stress non industry job for the winter, and keeping up my high productivity on my writing. I don't want to, mostly because I'm kinda a proud person and there were people who didn't think I could get film jobs here and I don't want them to be right. But I need to get a job, if only because I'm turning into a writer recluse and feel pretty boring.

I am being insanely productive on the writing side. I finished the first draft of Places yesterday. It took me two weeks to write that draft. Granted, draft one of any script isn't the hardest. Usually it writes itself or it falters and flails and I give up. It's rewriting that takes more stamina. But if I can get a first draft banged out in two weeks, I should be able to get a pilot done from brainstorming to reader-ready in six to eight weeks. I wouldn't be able to do that if I was working 12+ hour days, 6 days a week on a set. Maybe it's worth it to take a non film job for the next six months if it means that I'll really be LA ready at the end of my year in Michigan.