Last week, the Librarian read my students a book about wombats. Since most of my second graders don't know what the Australian creature is like, he started off with a description. "Wombats," he said, "are small, hairy bear-like creatures that are actually pretty friendly. They'll walk up to humans, let you pet them and feed them. However, after about a month or so they get bored. Just when you think you're starting to get to know the wombat, starting to develop a relationship and have a bond, he'll just wander off." Then he told the students they would take a test to see if they were wombats. I passed the test. Several of the boys I've gone out with would not.
So please be advised -- one day, Best Friend D and I will write a hilarious book on disastrous relationships. It will be called "XXX: and other secrets for getting the wrong guy." I can't tell you the real title. I'm not cool enough to be that unPC in public yet.